Why I Hate Tall People!

19 July 2007 at 12:05

So, having managed to sail through a couple of weeks without any coffee stains or burns... I encountered an event this morning *sigh*

There was I, happily whizzing around the staff restaurant filling orders for my team: Birdie's "dry cappuccino", DOW's tea " milky no sugar"; Waterman's 'Masala Chai' ; croissants and toasted bagels... I was in fine form, seeing as how I hadn't dropped anything...

While heading towards the grills to collect the last bagel - a smile on my face and a spring in my step - in the corner of my eye, I noticed a tall person approaching from my right.

I adjusted my speed and direction to avoid a collision and continued forward...

Still I am puzzled as to why the tall one: 'Mr Tallee' continues to consume increasing amounts of my peripheral vision...

my footsteps falter... "can't he see me?"

Now directly in my path, I note that unlike myself, Mr Tallee has not adjusted his speed or gait and is in fact speaking to a fellow tallee to my left.. I am trapped on both sides!

My body stiffens: "Fight or Flight"?

I speed up.

But what is 3 petite footsteps to a giant?
He could do a 100m sprint in 3 strides. Honest!
I wait for the inevitable and brace myself for impact; wincing as kneecaps collide with ribs and I find myself tasting the leather of his belt.

At LAST Mr Tallee notices me, and looks down in surprise to see me crumpled around his ankles.

"Oh, Sorry" he says and helps me re-attach my femur.

I glare at him and hobble off.

And this is why I hate tall people almost as much as I hate coffee.